I show concerned parents who want to give their children the best start to life how to better understand their children.

18 Mar 2013

What is parenting?

What is parenting?: an excerpt from Through the Crimson Mirror.

The “methods, techniques, etc., used or required to take care of and support children up to maturity”, is that putting a roof over your children’s heads and food in their stomachs? If you wanted to have children, I should hope you’d want to do that for them. To me, those are the kinds of things, which should be minimum requirements to become a parent. Let’s say that’s a good start. Surely though, parenting is much more than that. Let’s use a metaphor here to get a better understanding of what I mean.

In the business world, does the boss considered you an employee just for gracing the office with your presence? Do you receive a salary just for donning your company’s uniform? You might. Soon though, when the bosses catch on, chances are you’ll be out of there. Therefore, for the boss to consider you an employee, you must arrive at work on time and do your work.

Let’s take it a step further. Are you a good employee or employee of the month? Do you deserve a raise or bonus just for arriving on time and doing the minimum amount of work assigned to you? No, I don’t think so. You have to go the extra mile, put in a few extra hours, come up with a good idea, be proactive, get the big contract, impresses the bosses, etc.

How does all this relate to parenting? Well, in a similar vein, are you a parent just for having a baby? Based on the above, I hope most readers will agree and say, “No.” You need to provide your children with food, security, a roof over their heads, an education and a few other essentials.

Many great people have said it countless times before; to get the right answers we must ask the right questions. I hope no one reading this book is striving to be just a parent. Just do the bare minimum. If we look back at the question that started this SYMPHONY, “What is parenting?” it doesn’t seem like the right question to ask then. A better question to ask is, “What is great parenting?” I hope that throughout this book I’ll answer that question, or at least have a good stab at it. For the sake of having a definition that we can articulate, let’s conjure up a few points now.

Great parents put their own differences and prejudices aside. If they need help, they’re willing to get it and admit to their problems. They enable us by giving us choices, not opportunities on a silver platter, but rather skills so that we can have choices. With choices and skills, we can seek our own opportunities. Great parents teach us their mistakes and let us go, so we can make and learn from our own mistakes while they support us. When we ask for help in the end, they’re the ones who are there because they’re wiser and more experienced than we are, and realize that even they don’t know everything. They’re along for the ride with us, so they too learn and grow by our sides. Great parents teach us how to be strong, confident and how to communicate effectively. They realize that times change and things will never be the same as when they grew up. Parents such as these, light up a room when we enter because they’re as much a friend to us, as a parent. They show us proper family values and unconditional love, and what those things mean. Great parents muster the courage to firstly talk to us about, and secondly, tell the truth about, sex, drugs, alcohol, cigarettes and the peer pressure associated with these. They guide without force while showing discipline and still being kind. All he above, and more, makes you a great parent!

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I show concerned parents who want to give their children the best start to life
how to better understand their children.
And I show people who are facing difficulties that they are not alone

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